MY NEXT PROJECT
An Attempt to Out-Geek all the X-Files Geeks Out There
All right, I just finished watching season 9 of the X-Files. Over the past year and a half or so, I’ve purchased seasons 1-9 of the X-Files and watched them all in order for the first time ever. Yes, I watched them in order when they were on the air, of course, but I only started watching during season 3 – more specifically, the eighth episode of the season, “Oubliette.” I was instantly hooked and for the first and only time in my life, was absolutely devoted to watching every episode. At the time I was in college and didn’t even have a TV in my room. I would watch the X-Files every Sunday in a campus rec room, with anywhere from 5 to 20 people crammed in there (this room was about the size of my living room now). I never missed an episode of the X-Files under any circumstance – except for the time I was in Guatemala, and the time I was in a coma. Unavoidable circumstances, in other words.
I’m feeling a little overwhelmed, having finished all these episodes. I’m showing signs of X-Files overdose. You know what I’m talking about, it happens to everyone who watches an entire season over the span of a few days: When you hear a strange noise, you think “This is a case for Scully and Mulder.” When I think, “If only Agent Doggett were here, he could help me figure out where I parked my car,” it seems totally logical.
Anyway, I know I seriously can’t out-geek the real geeks out there. But I created some Excel spreadsheets and I’m going to keep tally while watching seasons 1 through 9 again. Some of the categories include:
Number of People Mulder Kills
Number of People Scully Kills
Number of Times in Hospital (seriously, they should be earning some major worker’s comp)
Number of Times Abducted
Number of Times Scully Sees Definitive Proof of Aliens but Still Doesn’t Believe
Number of Times Saved in the Nick of Time by Other
Illegal Break and Enters
Number of Times Mulder is Thought to Be Dead
You get the idea. Am I missing any categories? Anything else I should keep track of when I make my next pass through my favorite alternate TV universe? I briefly thought about “Number of Times Doggett Says Something in His Gravelly, Sexy Voice While Looking Damn Hot,” but that seemed too silly.
All right, I just finished watching season 9 of the X-Files. Over the past year and a half or so, I’ve purchased seasons 1-9 of the X-Files and watched them all in order for the first time ever. Yes, I watched them in order when they were on the air, of course, but I only started watching during season 3 – more specifically, the eighth episode of the season, “Oubliette.” I was instantly hooked and for the first and only time in my life, was absolutely devoted to watching every episode. At the time I was in college and didn’t even have a TV in my room. I would watch the X-Files every Sunday in a campus rec room, with anywhere from 5 to 20 people crammed in there (this room was about the size of my living room now). I never missed an episode of the X-Files under any circumstance – except for the time I was in Guatemala, and the time I was in a coma. Unavoidable circumstances, in other words.
I’m feeling a little overwhelmed, having finished all these episodes. I’m showing signs of X-Files overdose. You know what I’m talking about, it happens to everyone who watches an entire season over the span of a few days: When you hear a strange noise, you think “This is a case for Scully and Mulder.” When I think, “If only Agent Doggett were here, he could help me figure out where I parked my car,” it seems totally logical.
Anyway, I know I seriously can’t out-geek the real geeks out there. But I created some Excel spreadsheets and I’m going to keep tally while watching seasons 1 through 9 again. Some of the categories include:
Number of People Mulder Kills
Number of People Scully Kills
Number of Times in Hospital (seriously, they should be earning some major worker’s comp)
Number of Times Abducted
Number of Times Scully Sees Definitive Proof of Aliens but Still Doesn’t Believe
Number of Times Saved in the Nick of Time by Other
Illegal Break and Enters
Number of Times Mulder is Thought to Be Dead
You get the idea. Am I missing any categories? Anything else I should keep track of when I make my next pass through my favorite alternate TV universe? I briefly thought about “Number of Times Doggett Says Something in His Gravelly, Sexy Voice While Looking Damn Hot,” but that seemed too silly.
posted by ginsoakedgirl at 10:41 PM
4 Comments:
Number of times knocked unconscious?
Number of times telling Skinner the truth in the beginning would have saved everyone a lot of hassle?
Number of times Mulder says "It's all connected!" (probably not that many, but it seems like a lot)
Number of times Scully says, "Mulder," and then sighs exasperatedly?
Average number of seconds per longing look between M & S?
OK, those last two would get ridiculous. I'll keep thinking.
Good suggestions... I might add 'knocked unconscious' as a subcategory to 'hospitalized.'
I did add another category: Number of times Scully says "Oh, my god!" The "Mulder! *SIGH*" suggestion is good too. Although I don't know if I can keep track... doesn't that happen about 10 times per episode?
Another one:
Number of Times the X-Files are Shut Down (But Not Really)
Number of times Scully smiles (would be a very short list.)
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